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Carry On:
A comic about hyenas – really!
Carry On for Monday, April 18, 2016:
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A: So This Is "Exquisitely Romantic"
Fred: But— even if it were possible, I wouldn't want to do it now... I want it to be perfect. She deserves full-on romance... she can appreciate it, I think... I will begin by preparing her a meal of all her favorite delicacies. I will entertain her with her favorite romantic tunes. I will take her for a stroll around the garden at sunset, and show her all of the most lovely views. I will... I will gently caress her cheek, to let her know that I am willing to pleasure her in any way she so desires...
Fred: Then... if she doesn't take the initiative, I will... I will... *gulp!* I w-will... umm... ahhhhmmm...
Horn: What— sweat at her—?
B: Unnatural Acts
Horn: Honestly, Lieutenant— you're totally overthinking this—
Fred: Well, it isn't easy! Hyena lovemaking has been likened to defusing a bomb with chopsticks whilst blindfolded!
Fred: If I do something wrong— if I make a mistake— if I fail to please her—
Horn: Just relax and let your feelings flow— just do what comes naturally—
Fred: NONE OF THIS COMES NATURALLY TO ME, YOU IDIOT!
Fred: But— even if it were possible, I wouldn't want to do it now... I want it to be perfect. She deserves full-on romance... she can appreciate it, I think... I will begin by preparing her a meal of all her favorite delicacies. I will entertain her with her favorite romantic tunes. I will take her for a stroll around the garden at sunset, and show her all of the most lovely views. I will... I will gently caress her cheek, to let her know that I am willing to pleasure her in any way she so desires...
Fred: Then... if she doesn't take the initiative, I will... I will... *gulp!* I w-will... umm... ahhhhmmm...
Horn: What— sweat at her—?
B: Unnatural Acts
Horn: Honestly, Lieutenant— you're totally overthinking this—
Fred: Well, it isn't easy! Hyena lovemaking has been likened to defusing a bomb with chopsticks whilst blindfolded!
Fred: If I do something wrong— if I make a mistake— if I fail to please her—
Horn: Just relax and let your feelings flow— just do what comes naturally—
Fred: NONE OF THIS COMES NATURALLY TO ME, YOU IDIOT!
Sunday, July 1, 2017:
Fred’s Diaries have won first place in this year's Ursa Major Awards, in the Best Novel category! Many thanks to everyone who voted for us!
Fred’s Diaries have won first place in this year's Ursa Major Awards, in the Best Novel category! Many thanks to everyone who voted for us!
NOTICE: Persons attempting to find a motive in this narrative will be prosecuted; persons attempting to find a moral in it will be banished; persons attempting to find a plot will be shot.
~ Mark Twain
All characters and artwork (C)2004-2015 K. Garrison (carryoncomics@hotmail.com) or their original creators.
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Pages created by Carl Foxmarten.