A: The Lieutenant's Battle Tactics

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Fred (thinking): She wants to see my "battle plan," does she? Well— first, I will circle her left flank... I will then undermine her breastworks...

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Fred (thinking): ...pummel her rear hard... demand her unconditional surrender... and at the climax of the engagement, when she's begging for relief—

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Fred (thinking): —penetrate her defenses with my battering ram! oh... and... try not to faint.

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B: Consider The Consequences

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Fred (thinking): But... but if she's in heat... what if I get her... in a few months, everyone will know what we did... there could be trouble...

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Fred (thinking): Oh, but the wedding's in a couple of days! What's a couple of days one way or the other—?

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Fred (thinking): But... what if the wedding's delayed for some reason? Then there will be a huge scandal... shame and humiliation...

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Fred (thinking): ...the Home Guardsmen would probably give me a parade, though...